Words and music copyright 1998 by Steve Brooks

CHORUS

Down in the town of New Braunfels
There's a lad who's sadder but wiser.
He's paying a fine
For the terrible crime
Of wearing immoral fibers.

He was driving around with his mama.
They stopped off to pick up some cheese.
He was standing there checking the cheddar
When an officer told him to freeze.
They took him and booked him on charges
Of making an obscene display.
I'd tell you the word that offended,
But I think that I'd better not say.

CHORUS

He wasn't out robbing a Quik-Stop.
He wasn't out smoking up crack.
His mama said he was a nice boy
Who would give you the shirt off his back.
Now he's got a criminal record,
Although he is only eighteen,
All because he was wearing a T-shirt -
And that is what's really obscene.

CHORUS

So watch what you wear in New Braunfels,
Or you might end up in the can.
The cops there have no sense of humor
And way too much time on their hands.
And don't make a statement of fashion
With words from the old Anglo-Saxon.
Just put it in French or in Latin,
'Cause you don't know when shirt's gonna happen.

CHORUS